Scaredy cat! We still tremble at the thought of being called one. It was an old, schoolyard chop-down, but it stored a deep fear of inadequacy in our subconscious reminding us to never be scared, or sure as hell not admit it.
Are you scared of not being good enough? Or maybe you’re scared of failure, or success even? Scared of moving away from your hometown for a life of travel? How about asking someone out? Going in for the kiss? Asking for a raise?
So there’s this thing that watches over our shoulders like a hawk. Sometimes, we’re threatened by it and other times it can set us free. It’s the friend who’s misunderstood. An ally, when viewed from our lens of courage, or the demon of our worst nightmares when we entertain its illusions.
It is the most powerful catalyst for change, growth, and freedom yet it holds most in its shadowy clutches.
Why is it here and why does it keep getting in our way? Pro tip: it’s here to serve you; as a catalyst to choose growth instead of decay. Hope rather than dread. Evolution over degeneration. Success instead of failure.
In the book Success Through A Positive Mental Attitude, the authors state: “A failure uses up as much energy in his work at failing as a successful person uses in winning success.”
Fear wishes to repress you. Faith wishes to express you.
When Fear is Useful
You come home and smell gas in the house and then your roommate is like: “Yo, hit this bong!”; as he switches the lighter on. Having a deep concern for the place going up in flames, you dive into him head first, take the bong yourself and take a rip.
But having a deep fear and sense of urgency that your place would catch on fire is a reasonable application and use of fear. Humans wouldn’t still be around if that mechanism wasn’t in place.
So then, when is fear an illusion and its tricks on the mind irrational?
In every other occasion that does not involve life and death
Social status, what someone will think of you, and not knowing the answers to life don’t qualify, sorry. The good news is it’s time to drop the power those fears have on you.
How we act when fear shows up is what separates those who live in the murky depths of life and those who soar high above in all of its majesty.
Fear is Faith in Disguise
It’s easy to be comfortable when everything is going right. The real mastery of your personal development and power is being comfortable with being uncomfortable. Fear is the catalyst for evolution. It’s a reminder that we have free will. What a gift. See it as such.
Most fears are senseless and bogus. I like to refer to these as idle fears and to dissolve these fears quickly and effectively, we must get into action. Idle fears feed off a lack of necessary motion both in mind and body and evaporate from the combustion of action. The moment you begin to feel the worries, say a quick, earnest prayer (if that’s your thing), then begin to transmute your energy into something constructive.
What is classified as constructive?
- Anything other than idleness
- Do the dishes
- Make your bed
- Walk around the block
- Read a book
- Anything other than idleness
If it’s a particular fear you know could be of use to you such as a public speaking class or asking your manager for a raise, then the only way out of the fear is to walk right through it. It’s like that apprehension we had as kids just before jumping off of the high dive for the first time.
As Shia Labeouf says, Just Do It!
You see, it’s not about finding a no-fear cure. It’s knowing what to do when it strikes. And the formula of staying busy is the great antidote. Don’t allow its poison to set in too deep. Get moving and thank it for catapulting you further into your evolution.
You know what else helps mitigate the sting of fear?
Admitting that you’re scared
You don’t have to shout it out loud at the library. Just a quick, internal acknowledgment is enough to eliminate the friction of resistance. It’s liberating, because it’s a reminder of the very essence of our humanity. Feeling ashamed for being scared only inhibits your progress rather than allowing it to unfold.
Remember, it’s what we do with our fear that determines whether we experience or hide from life.
The World is Rooting You On!
All too much we hear we live in a “dog eat dog” world where people are out to get us. The truth is, humans are still around because the good in people has trumped the destructive powers of the force. Let’s believe in ourselves and each other. To quote Jim Carrey:
“You can fail at what you don’t want, so you might as well take a chance on doing what you love.”
So what’s the one thing you’d be doing if you had someone’s blessing to cheer you on? What is it that moves you the most?
Maybe it’s life asking you to get out there and practice some self-love. We all could use some more of that and seeing our fear as an ally is a perfect place to start.